Category Archives: Faith

Family Jewels

“Rise in the presence of the aged, show respect for the elderly and revere your God. I am the Lord.” Leviticus 19:32

I had the most delightful conversation with my stepmother yesterday.  We have been playing phone tag for quite some time, and finally we were able to catch up.

She is an incredible woman of strength and even temperament.  Even with losing my dad in December, she remains faithful to our Christ and is slowly finding a new sense of normal – though she misses him terribly.  We chatted about everything we could think of.  I loved listening to her talk from her perspective about the important things in life.  Wisdom that only comes from having lived through it.  It’s like a sneak peak at the future with tips and advice on the tough stuff.

After our conversation, I thought about my family and pondered how important the generations ahead of us are to us and those coming behind.  They have so much insight and wisdom to share.  It is, indeed, their priceless legacy.

My grandmother was a woman of incredible strength and poise.  She was a southern lady – soft as a flower with the tenacity of a tiger.  She taught me invaluable lessons about relationships, cooking, budget-keeping, well, almost everything!  Her mother, my great-grandmother was also a beautiful and strong woman.  I was 12 when she passed away, and growing up my claim to fame was that I knew someone born in the 1800s.  1899 to be exact.

My great grandmother and I sat together many summer afternoons on my grandmother’s couch and snapped green beans.  And I loved sleepovers with her.  As she got ready for bed, I was amazed at the regime of hair rollers, facial cream, etc. she performed every night.  When it was time for bed, she and I would lie there and play “Guess Whose Sleeping?”  A game (I think she made up) where we had to be completely quiet, and the first person to fall asleep would say, I’m asleep.  Silly.  I know.  But fun.  Our generational gap showed once when I was a tween and came over to visit in my brand new bleached jeans.  They were my favorite birthday present!  She looked at them and said, Why I wouldn’t have even picked corn in those pants.  Ha!  We agreed to disagree. 🙂

My grandmother was my second mother.  She made the best blue cheese dressing and was my daycare because my mom worked.  She was a very funny lady, and family meant everything to her.  When she grew older, she sat me down once and showed me the linens that had been in our family for generations and told me what was what and who it was from.  Family was her heart.  Mess with any of us, and you had to reckon with her!

When I was young, these ladies told me a true story that defines who they both were.  Back in America’s unfortunate days of segregation, my grandmother and great-grandmother went shopping in downtown Atlanta.  While in a clothes store, they saw a young African-American girl who was in distress.  They approached her and asked her what was wrong.  She had to use the restroom really bad.  She was desperate, but the only bathroom was for white people only.

In the days of great hostility and shakeup, these ladies decided to buck the system and help this young girl.  My great-grandmother hid the young girl under coat and assisted her to the store’s white’s-only restroom.  My grandmother stood guard outside.  Trust me, no one was going to get past my grandmother.  She was too smart, too sweet and knew how to use both to help this precious girl.

Hearing their story showed me how to put the Bible into real life practice.  Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

My grandfather was an upstanding man in our community.  Everyone knew him and liked him.  He knew how to stretch a dollar and make touch decisions as the leader of the family, but he had a real soft side that only a few of us saw.  I would describe him as a pillar.  Strong.  Unwavering.  Kind, generous and practical.

The best financial lesson I ever received was from him right after Bruce and I got married.  I was a young 19, and had lived with my grandparent s for 3 years following my mom’s death.  I visited them one day about a year after the wedding, and my grandfather surprised us with a washer & dryer for the tiny foreclosure we bought.  However, he sat me down at the table on the back porch and took out his wallet.  He opened it (never taking anything out of it) and said, This is the last time we will help you.  You are married now, and it’s up to Bruce and you to handle your finances.  Then, he literally, physically, shut his wallet and put it in his back pocket.

Wow!  How’s that for an object lesson?  There was absolutely no ambiguity of where he stood, and it was the best thing he could have done for us.  From that day forward, 22 years later, we have been completely on our own financially, making good decisions and accepting the consequences for the bad.  I learned in about 30 seconds that my life was my responsibility.  It is one of my life’s greatest learned lessons.

Our society truly undervalues the older generation.  However, they are an untapped resource of knowledge and strength from which to draw.  During my mother-in-law’s recent battle with cancer, she told me one day while we sat together, I’m not ready to go yet.  I have so much to still teach you guys.  Like how to use newspaper for lining the insides of your shoes when they wear out.

That conversation stuck with me.  We have thousands and millions of people right at our fingertips who know what it is like to live through rationing; to work as a community for the good of the whole; to give us advice on self-sacrifice (something my current generation and the one after me doesn’t know) and leadership.  We need people to tell us how to live within a budget, how to work hard – even if it is for the benefit of someone else, and that less truly is more.  We need to be told the beauty of appreciating simple moments and be admonished on just how short life really is – something those ahead of us have much to offer to the conversation.

The way things are in the world right now, we should be having lots of conversations with those who know how to survive and thrive in the face of unpredictable hardship.

On thing I love is that we worship at church with the elderly.  We have Widow Sunday periodically where the widows are given a white rose to wear, and everyone who sees them gives them a hug.  This is respect that is biblical and esteemed by God.  I love to watch the older generation at church.  Sometimes I glance around and watch them sing, with their eyes closed, hymns like It Is Well and Amazing Grace because there are decades of history in their voices.  Decades upon decades of living in God’s faithfulness – and in theirs to Him.  I study their faces and think of the hard times they’ve survived, loved ones they lost, and health crises they’ve faced – yet here they are, every week, worshiping God. I think to myself, Teach me.  Show me.  Guide me.  They are an example I want to follow.  One I want my children to follow.  Inter-generational worship, be it in church service or spending time with those of the older generation, is extremely important for everyone’s benefit.

My heart was so touched when my oldest teen told me that he saw our special widow friend at church and went up to her and gave her a hug and chatted – all on his own.  They were both blessed.  We live in such a “me” generation, and the one coming behind is even more so.  We as parents must teach our children the value of all people – not just those who are in the same season of life as us.

Studies show that communities where the elderly are honored, respected and highly regarded have a considerably longer life expectancy.  Interesting.  The fact is, we will all be there one day, hopefully, and it will be our turn to share advice, stories, and life lessons.  Will anyone listen to us?

Restless

I’m not sure where all of this is leading us, but Bruce (my husband) and I are restless.  We can’t pretend we never saw the need.  We can’t pretend there isn’t STILL a need.  We can’t  ignore the 26,000 children who will die today from otherwise preventable sickness and disease.

We can’t forget the love and friendship extended to us when we were in Kenya.  We can’t forget the smiles and humble nature of the Kenyans from whom Americans could learn a lot!  We keep circling back to a place where we are so confused.  Both of us knew only our way of life for our entire lives.  Yes, we saw impoverished people on t.v.  Yes, we learned about people groups from all over the world in school.  However, I think we have finally realized why we are different now after going on mission to Kenya.

There is a strong, idol-like filter on America.  Everything we see, heard and read about pre-Kenya passed through a filter that encompassed all of our senses and soul.  The filter is called, normal.  What people view as normal is what they come to accept for their lives as the way things are supposed to be.  The most frightening thing about this filter is that we grew up believing our normal is right.  Right for us.  Before our trip, we heard of needs and did our best to meet them through financial aid and giving our time and energy toward projects like Operation Christmas Child and Samaritan’s Purse.  We went to bed at night, resting our heads on our soft pillows behind locked doors in a safe home, and we slept peacefully believing we had done what was required of us as believers.

Our restlessness isn’t only about experiencing the devastating needs in Kenya, which is much like so many other countries, but about who we are called to be as Christ-followers.  Just as when I add filters to my camera lens, everything I see through the viewfinder is altered by the filter’s skew.  It’s the same way with the American filter.  It has been removed, and Bruce and I stand wide-eyed, to the point of nausea, at what we allowed ourselves to become out of pure ignorance.  Our society is so content and comfortable where we are, that we risk nothing out of that comfort zone that jeopardizes what we want.  For some to say that they feel solely called to help fellow Americans, which is important in its own rite, says, as David Platt puts it in his book Radical, we boast that we feel called to help only 5% of the world’s population.  Is that Christ?

During one of our annual events held to benefit Samaritan’s Purse, someone I know came up to me and said, This is good and all, but next year I’m keeping my money here and helping my homeland.

Again, that is great and noble and needed.  But, dare I say, it is not enough.  Would any of us be believers today had the disciples in Acts stayed right where they were and never acted on the Great Commission given by Jesus?

Our society is drunk on pleasure, gorged on greediness, and is caught in a sleeper-hold of comfort.  My family is among them.   I am ashamed to say that our society will take care of others, only after the portion we give ourselves is met first.  What could possibly be an example of this?  Most people in the world live on a $1 or less.  Our society spends hundreds of dollars, if not thousands, on sports and arts for our children, thousands on holiday decorations, hundreds of thousands on clothes, shoes and cosmetics.  This isn’t mentioning the billions on vehicles, homes and education.  The far majority of what we spend our money on will not last. There will be no legacy.  No lasting impact for the Kingdom.  No special approval from God.  It’s just stuff that has woven us in its web and convinced us that these things will mean something one day.  Will they?

Below is an email that we recently received from our dear friend, Joseph.  We met him in Kenya. He is an overseer of an orphanage that we fell absolutely in love with there.  Some friends of ours are back there right now, and delivered a box of supplies we sent with them.  When we read this, we cried.  Why?  Because Joseph is a fellow believer.  We will spend eternity with him.  For now, he is hurting.  A couple of months ago, he lost his oldest son, whom we met, while trying to earn money for his family as a taxi driver of a piki piki (motorcycle).  We were devastated by the news.

It is very true that until a connection is made, it’s very easy for people to shrug off what they don’t want to deal with.  Joseph and the children are family to us. We pray for them every day.  The depth of my heart that was touched by his letter is impossible to put into words.  I invite you to share it with me…

Hi,

Greetings in the name of Jesus, how are you? We are all fine here. God has blessed us with rain although to others it devastating. The crops are doing well despite only yellowing of leaves in corn.

Your friends came to visit us on Wednesday, and they relayed your greetings and your friends’.

We have received the supplies and we are all happy about them.

We are happy when we are with you in prayers and we will not forget you for being with us also in the time of grief.  May God be with you and guide you as we are praying for you .

I remember your compassion when you were with us. The love of Christ that I have for you is never ending, may God bless you.

 Yours Faithfully,

 Joseph

To me, his letter was like reading the New Testament.  Brothers and sisters in Christ sharing His love and friendship whether near or far apart.  This is what will last.  This is what will impact future generations.  This is what furthers the Kingdom.  The photos below are of the Kenyans’ normal.  Does this look okay to us who have homes and vehicles and jobs?  I shot these throughout Kenya, not one solitary corner of the community. Step outside of Nairobi (with its slums as well as the business sector) and this is the countryside – a small, but accurate sampling.

I am most certain this post today will upset some people.  Frankly, I am upset too, as I see what believers in our country are capable of doing and what it is NOT being done.  Bruce and I don’t have all the answers, but we are restless.  Are you?


Selah Day? Sort of…

Happy Sunday!  Don’t you just love a day off?  Sunday may not be a day off for everyone, but I hope some time this week you’ve had a chance to decompress. We plan to do just that today. Although, it’s not exactly a nap on the couch kind of day. May is a crazy month, and there are all kinds of things wrapping up this weekend. But, we will enjoy time worshiping God in church and spending family time celebrating milestones. Who knows…maybe that elusive nap will happen after all?  I know my hubby isn’t giving up hope. 🙂

Enjoy your Selah Day, the Sabbath, and let’s not forget to thank Him who made this day and gifted it to us – and to keep it holy.

See you back tomorrow with more real…deep…stuff!

Lessons I’ve Learned From My Children

They say a picture is worth a thousand words.  Below are our photographs of lessons I’ve learned through my children in unexpected moments sharing life together.  I wouldn’t trade these experiences, or what they’ve taught me, for anything.

Always start the day with hope

Stay curious

God cares about the details

Some things are better left alone

Chase your dreams

Expect the unexpected

Know when to hold onto and when to let go

Look for life’s blessings

Don’t rush life

Find hidden treasure

Always be ready to make a new friend

Be spontaneous

Never forget old friends  (We had no idea these guys survived winter in our pond until we cleaned it out recently!)

Be thankful

Watch your step  (Found this guy while rock climbing)

Our lives are part of God’s divine design

Prayer binds family ties

Life is better together

Hands That Hold

Photo via case.edu

I saw a familiar sight as I walked out of the grocery store.  A dad and his daughter, no more than three years old, simply talking while walking to their car with groceries in hand. However, just as I glanced over, she began to pitch a monumental fit!  Arms flailing, crying, screaming-she threw herself on the ground.

My very first thought was, Boy am I glad my kids are past that stage!  Ha!

I was curious as to how the dad would respond.  With a bag of groceries in his left hand, he reached down with his right arm and picked his daughter up and carried her, barrel-style, all the way to the car.  I was memorized at how calm, cool and collected he was.  He didn’t lash out or yell or anything.  He also knew better than to try to reason with a three year-old in this state. He simply picked her up and walked on with her under his arm as she continued to fuss and flail.

My second thought was, Wow, that dad is amazing!  He didn’t even flinch.  

God spoke to me and said, Look familiar?

Yes, indeed, I snickered.  I remember those days with my kids like it was yesterday.

I’m not talking about your kids.  I’m talking about you, He whispered.

Oh my!  He was right.  There have been times in my life when God needed to intervene for my good even when I disagreed.  No discussion.  No reasoning.  Just action on His part in response to mine.  Whether I am overwhelmed with emotion, or so busy I can’t clearly think things through, God never gets flustered.  He is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8).

Would it have been okay for that dad to have driven off in frustration and left his toddler in the parking lot?  Would it have been okay to let her have her way and stay lying on the ground in the middle of the road with cars coming and going?  Would he have really had been able to articulate all the reasons why she needed to get up and move to safety?  Not in that moment. This dad acted in her best interest even though she didn’t understand or agree with his response.

I am so thankful that God does the same for us.  He sees the bigger picture and understands situations far better than we do.  When circumstances arise that we fall apart over, God is still on His throne and is able to make decisions based on what’s best for us-even if we’re throwing a fit on the inside.  Even if it means He must proverbially pick us up and remove us from the situation whether we think we know what we want or not and regardless if we think we know what’s best for us at the moment.

His hands are strong.  His heart is loving.  His mind is omnipotent.  Even when we falter and lose our senses, He is still in control.  There is a time for everything.  A time to discipline.  A time to discuss.  And a time to simply act on our behalf.

Below are some photos I’ve taken that remind me of His hands, His wisdom and His love for us. May we be able to walk obediently with God today.  And if not, may He know when we need to be picked up and carried.

The LORD answered Job… and said, “Who shut up the sea behind doors when it burst forth from the womb, when I made the clouds its garment and wrapped it in thick darkness, when I fixed limits for it and set its doors and bars in place, when I said, ‘This far you may come and no farther; here is where your proud waves halt’?  Job 38: 1, 8-11

Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?  Matthew 6:26

…See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?  Matthew 6:28-30

(Creation You have made) all looks to you to give them their food at the proper time.  When you give it to them, they gather it up; when you open your hand, they are satisfied with good things. Psalm 104:27-28

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Psalm 19:1

<<Check out the companion song to this post on my Tunes page!>>

Prettier Ribbons

Photo via Maxmedals.com

Yesterday, my kids and I walked past a store front that boasted contestants’ winning art from a statewide contest.  The handcrafted works were impressive.  So were the brightly colored, shiny ribbons that hung from them.

Ironically, this was the same contest my tween son entered via a different organization.  He won several ribbons of his own for his work. (Mom blushes) However, as we gazed at the artwork, he said with disappointment, Those are prettier ribbons than mine.  It made me double-take a glance at the ribbons, bewildered as to what he saw that was so special in them.

My young tween competed against kids from all over the state up to 12th grade.  It was a super great day for him because he worked so hard on his projects.  And, if I may add, they were done without an iota of parent help (except with the electric saw that he’s not allowed to use).

However, after admiring these ribbons, his bubble of excitement and enthusiasm over his own ribbons popped because of how he compared these to his own.  There wasn’t anything I could say.  His ribbons now seemed inferior.

His reaction really made me stop and think about how I respond to life’s ribbons.  You know, people’s accolades, winks of approval, and (for some) tangible awards like bonuses, trophies and certificates.  Oh, and pretty ribbons.

We can work ourselves to the bone, and feel really good about what we’ve accomplished, but all of our sense of self-worth tanks with a casual shrug, a word of mediocracy, a glance of semi-approval, or worse – no comment at all! – by an objective onlooker who gives great praise to another for their work.

It is one thing to be an active part of community, and therefore give our best effort to the task. It’s another thing to place our value, self-esteem, significance, and entire sense of accomplishment in comparison to others’ accolades.

The day my son received his awards, he was humbly overjoyed!  I took a photograph of him with the ribbons hung from his ears and fingers so we could get them all in the shot.  Now, his seem tarnished, less significant, to him.

It makes me wonder, whose approval do we seek?  Others’, ourselves’, or God’s?  God is pretty clear about how He feels on the subject of hard work.

And whatever you do,whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:17

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men…Colossians 3:23

Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10 (The Apostle Paul)

As someone who struggles with her self-esteem, I must fight against finding my validation in anyone but Christ.  He is my audience of One in my heart, but my head doesn’t always reflect this truth.  I compare myself to others.  Wow, she’s accomplished.  Look at her career!  Or, She always has it together, I wish I could be like her.  Or how about, If I only looked like this woman, was as articulate as this other woman, and was as smart as this other woman, I’d be the total package. Then there is the whisper in my mind, If only I could do my job like her, and be noticed by them, then I will have finally made it!

What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? Mark 8:36

Whose standard am I measuring myself against?  Is God looking down at me and constantly thinking these same inferior thoughts about me?  I think not!  He created all of us differently, for unique purposes on this earth.  If He says we are doing a good job, a great job!,  then that should be enough – no matter how shiny the other person’s ribbons may seem.  When we’ve done something we know He asked us to do – be it a good, honest day’s work or something extraordinary in our daily grind – it should be enough to hear His words, Well done, good and faithful servant.  It is… more than enough.

Today, I’m putting blinders over my heart when I see other people’s pretty ribbons.  I’ll congratulate them on a great job, but I will remind myself that was their job – not mine – good for them.  For me, I will seek only the smile on my Master’s face as my greatest reward. Anything else attained is all glory to Him. Ribbons or no ribbons, prettiest or not, I will sleep well at night knowing I did my best.  It’s all we’ve ever asked of our children, and it’s all God has asked of me, too.

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.  But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21


Crossroads of trust

(C) by http://www.martin-liebermann.de

You may buy prints or posters from zeitspuren.deviantart.com Kind regards Martin Liebermann license@martin-liebermann.de http://www.martin-liebermann.de

*********************************************************************************************************************************

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.  Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

What do we do when something unexpected comes up in our lives?  We didn’t ask for it, nor are prepared for it.  It’s not necessarily a bad thing, and could even be a good thing, but because we didn’t write it on our agenda it shakes us up.  How do we make decisions about it?  How do we pray about it?

I am extremely purpose-driven.  I took a personality test many years ago that nailed me.  It said that if I believe in something, I will give it my 100%.  But, if I don’t believe in it, then I find it nearly impossible to do it.  Oh my!  This test was so right!  It explains all of the decisions I’ve made in my life.

As manager of our house (my husband is the leader, but I manage most of the daily affairs), I project, plan and prepare.  Those three p’s keep our home running smoothly most of the time. Then, the unexpected happens.  How do I handle it?  Where does it fit?  How does it fit?  Can I support it? Believe in it?  Do it?

The bigger question, is…do I believe He who is over all things in my life? If something is from God, whether I exepcted it or not, or wanted it or not, I must trust Romans 8:28,

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Ouch.  There it is.  His purposes – not mine.  I’ll be honest and say some things have come up that have altered my agenda.  Some I see as good. Some not so good.  And some – I don’t know how I feel about them yet.

I get all twisted up when trying to manage an agenda that has question marks written all over the plans.  I try to think of every possible scenario of how these unknowns fit into our family’s puzzle.  I can’t.  I don’t have all of the information.  That really bothers me!  I am a big-picture girl.  Let me see the end product, and then we can work out a plan to get there.

This thinking is seldom how God operates.  Why?  Because if we could see the bigger picture, #1 we may or may not like what we see and therefore we will either bulldoze the quickest path to the outcome or be purposefully disobedient to stave it off.  Either way, our hands are all over it – not God’s.  #2 – Seeing the bigger picture requires no trust on our part.  Trust draws us near to God.  He didn’t create us to be mindless robots. There are hundreds of decisions we make every day.  But, some stuff requires trust, because trust forces us to pry our hands off of the situation and surrender control.  Ug.  That is hard.

When praying for a friend today, I realized I needed the same prayer!  It went something like this:

Dear Lord, please give my friend eyes to see You, ears to hear You, a mind to understand what You are asking her to do, hands & feet to do it, and a heart to accept it.  Oh, and a big dose of courage would be great, too.

I forget that talking to God about my concerns isn’t necessarily doubting Him.  He is big enough to handle our questions.  He knows our hearts, and therefore He urges us to talk things over with Him.  It’s okay.  He also knows we are human.  Dust breathed to life.  If you’re like me, we shy away from God because approaching Him with feelings, questions, and concerns makes us feel guilty – like we don’t have enough faith.  But, it is times exactly like these that grow our faith.  If we avoid the journey of communicating with God, we miss the opportunity to stretch and strengthen our faith on the path He has chosen for us.

As I was exercising this morning, I talked to God much like I would my husband.  Plain English, nothing fancy, and just told Him my thoughts, concerns, opinions and feelings.  Because of this time with God, I am reminded He is in charge, He loves us, and is working for His glory and our best interest.  And, nothing I talked to Him about is mine to ultimately control and destine. What a weight off of my shoulders!

Believers walk in the path crafted by God.  We didn’t create the path.  We follow it.  May all of us have the courage, strength and audacious faith to take the first step.

The Unexpected Gift

Photo via Droid Wallpapers

I had the privilege of celebrating my son’s 16th birthday this weekend.  Little did we know, this day would change his life forever.

It was a very full day of several events, one of which was my daughter’s soccer game.  My husband and I drove separately with plans to meet at the field.  I had our boys with me.  As we drove to the game, my birthday boy talked on the cell phone to his nana as I approached a busy intersection.  Turning right at the light, we saw a homeless gentleman standing on the corner holding a sign and asking for food.

There was nothing I could do because of the traffic flow.  We were already 20 minutes late to the game, and I wasn’t quite sure where I was even going as this was the first time they’ve played at this field.  Add to that, the concrete medians and turn lanes and lights, and well, this was not something I could easily navigate on the fly.

However, we have gift bags in our van for just such an occasion as running into a person who is homeless.  We keep a laundry basket in the back of the van filled with brightly colored, glossy gift bags with lots of colorful curly ribbon tied to the handle and tissue paper bursting out from the bag.  In the bags, we put soup, water, granola bars, etc. along with encouraging Scripture and a prayer of salvation.  The reason we dress everything up in a gift bag is because we wonder just how long it may have been that someone in this desperate state has received a present.  It has been a joy to hand these out and connect with our community, as well as have deep conversations with our children about our responsibility as believers to help others by being the hands and feet of Christ.

Knowing these bags were in the back made me feel quite guilty that the spontaneity of the moment did not lend itself to give this gentleman one.  My birthday boy finished his phone call with Nana, then began to tell me how we needed to go back to the man.

I was torn between arriving even later at my daughter’s last game before tournament and delivering the gift bag.  I was tired from a very busy week and, well, I came to the end of myself.

I told my son, Tell you what, we’ll drive back the same way after the game and look for him.

My son replied, But we don’t know how long he’s been there.  Maybe a long time.  We should go back now.

Disheartened by my inability to be both places at once, I promised we’d go after the game.  We reached the field, but my son couldn’t let it go.  He is an extremely easy-to-please kind of guy who rarely has strong preferences.  He goes with the flow and has quite a relaxed personality.  But this time, he was insistent.

We really have to go back, Mom, he persisted.  I can’t let this go.

I was a bit baffled at his insistence because we’ve given out many bags and will continue to.  I didn’t understand what was different with my son this time.  We walked down the field, set up our chairs next to my husband’s, and I plopped myself down hoping to stave off a migraine, caused by an impending weather front, that I felt coming on.

Can we leave and come back? he asked.  It won’t take long.  I know I’m supposed to do this.

I’m happy to try look for him on our way home, Honey.  The game won’t be much longer, I replied nursing my headache.

A few moments passed as we watched the game, then he asked again.  Can we go at halftime?

This was really unlike him.  Typically, he is the first to let something go.  A peaceful life is more important to him than pushing his issue.

How about you ask your dad to take you at halftime? I proposed.  My migraine was at the crossroads of either going away or blowing up to epic proportions.

The halftime whistle blew, and my husband and son bolted to the van.  I have no earthly idea why I said this (referring to the gift bags), but before they left, out of my mouth spilled, Why not take two?  I didn’t know if he decided to or not as they drove away.

The second half of the game began, and eventually my husband and son reappeared.  I asked my son, Was he still there?  Did you give him the bag?

Yes and no, he answered.  That made no sense to me.  The situation was either or, so I inquired.

This is what they told me…they drove back to the large intersection, but didn’t see the gentleman.  Disappointed, they crossed the intersection to make a u-turn and return to the game.  Just then, my husband saw the man at a city bus stop out of the corner of his eye.  My two guys devised a plan and as quickly as possible they made the u-turn in hopes of catching up to the man.  As they approached the bus, the man got onto the bus and it drove off.

Arg!  What were they going to do?  They weren’t sure, but they knew they couldn’t give up.  In a split-second decision, they followed the bus many blocks as it bypassed the next five stops.  At the sixth stop, the bus finally stopped.  Our son jumped out of our van and ran toward the bus. A businessman stepped off of the bus, saw my son, and told the bus driver someone was coming and to please wait for him.  She held the bus for my son, and he jumped aboard and asked the bus driver, Can you please wait a second?

He said she looked stunned and confused, but agreed.  Our son walked the aisle of the bus toward the back where the man was sitting.  He approached the man and held out his hand to him and introduced himself with a firm handshake and a big smile.

What did you say? I asked with eager anticipation on the field during the 3rd quarter.

Our son continued, I told him that we saw him earlier, but couldn’t turn around.  That Jesus loved him and wanted him to know that.  Then I gave him the gift bag.  

Okay, hold on a second, I interrupted.  You mean you guys followed the bus several blocks, and you jumped out of our van, ran to the bus, hopped onto the bus and asked the bus driver to hold her schedule and wait for you?  Really? I said with sheer astonishment.  Our son has never done anything this bold before.

What did the man say? What did he do? I asked.

Well, after shaking my hand, he sat there for several seconds – speechless.  He had a blank stare on his face as if in disbelief.  Then, I gave him the bag and his eyes grew huge!  He couldn’t believe it was for him.  He said, “Thanks so much.  I appreciate it.”  Mom, this man shared a seat with his fellow homeless friend.  And…I had two bags.  The other man looked at me kindly and said, “Thank you.” 

My son sat next to me at the game completely sure that this task was the prompting of the Holy Spirit.  We talked about what it felt like to be the hands and feet of Christ, literally.

We knew in our hearts that God had an agenda on this particular day.  He knew this man’s timeline and had a divine appointment with him.  If my husband and son had not ran to the van, or they caught a red light, or simply weren’t looking in the precise direction of the bus, they would have missed him for sure.  It was an almost near-miss, but it wasn’t.  This mission impossible was perfectly executed with a team of players from our little family, to my daughter’s soccer game that was at this time and in this first-ever location, to the clerk who checked out the gift items at the store, to the business man who called out to hold the bus, to the bus driver who let my son hop on momentarily, to the other cars who drove around my husband’s van as he waited on the road behind the bus.  Do you see how extraordinary this ordinary moment was?  The people. The timing.  The whole thing was beyond coincidence.  It was as though it had been rehearsed a million times – yet none of us knew it.  God did.

For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost. Luke 19:10

This was no not about my guys, rather what God had on His mind that afternoon.  Even more than receiving the gift bag, this man needed to see God pursue him.  Think about how it would’ve felt for the man to be sitting on the corner holding a sign for food for who knows how long, then ride the bus for several blocks when a teenage stranger jumps on with a colorful, shiny bag and says that he saw him earlier and had this gift for him so they chased the bus down.  I would have been speechless, too!

There was a duel purpose in God’s will that day.  Things could have played out like the other times when we’ve sat at a red light and simply made the acquaintance of someone who needs food and we’ve given them the bag.  No.  Not this time.  God radically pursued this gentleman in a very personal way.

For this is what the Sovereign Lord says: I myself will search for my sheep and look after them. Ezekiel 34:11

We don’t know if this man has ever accepted Christ as his personal Savior, but truly he was sought by God because God allowed everything to work out to the very second.  Whether his soul was lost, or perhaps he just felt lost in society-displaced by circumstance-or lonely. Perhaps he felt lost within himself or separated from family. We don’t know this man’s story, but God moved heaven and earth to be a part of it. 

We may be utterly lost in our lives, in ourselves, and feel completely alone, but we are not.  We are never out of arm’s reach of God who made us, breathed life into us, and sent His Son as the final blood sacrifice for us.  No other god has ever done that.  God’s love is relentless, radical, unconditional and unstoppable.  The choice is ours to accept it.

(The prodigal son said) ‘I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.’  So he got up and went to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again;he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate. Luke 15:20-24

The biggest part for my husband, who couldn’t get through the story without choking back tears was, as he said, Two bags.  Not three, not one, not four…two.  No one could have ever known this man would have a friend with him in the same dire straits.  But God did.  For our son, he summed it up best when he told us, “Being a small part of this incredible moment was the best birthday present I received.”

<<Check out the companion song to this post on my Tunes page!>>

A Time To…

 

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:

2     a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3     a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4     a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5     a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6     a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7     a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8     a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Today, I am feeling verse 4!  A time to laugh and a time to dance!

One really cool thing about being a believer is that joy comes from the inside out.  Circumstance isn’t the dictator of our souls.  We rest in knowing God holds all things in His hands.

And with that holy rest, we are FREE to release everything to Him who is in control.  Free to live the abundant life Jesus came for in John 10:10.  To open up and be vulnerable to the work God is doing in our lives.  To take healthy risks.  To draw boundaries.  To feel the goodness of life God has crafted into every day.  Free to feel.  Heal.  Be strong.  Be brave.  Take that first step.  To trust God.  To try something new!  To stop and breathe and appreciate the moment.  Free to enjoy the day designed before time and space ever met.

What a day!  A great day!  A day of mystery, adventure and intrigue.  Who knows what secrets it holds?  Although we may laugh and dance and celebrate life’s blessings differently, let’s do it nonetheless.  We are only given today.  So get out your dancing shoes, or don your bare feet, and enjoy it!  I won’t laugh at the way you dance if you won’t laugh at me. 🙂

The Cure for a Mid-Life Crisis

Photo via Pinterest

I dreaded turning 40 my entire life.  That number always seemed like a lifetime away! Well, it came knocking on my door, and I have to say I didn’t handle it very well.  Okay, I freaked out.  I tried to hide it on the outside, but on the inside things changed.  Wow, I never thought I’d be a cliché, but so much of what people say about turning 40 is true!

I began to look back on my life – the good, bad and the ugly.  I spent quiet time alone reflecting on the way things were and they way things are now.  I noticed physical changes (oh joy!) as well as a shift in my attitude – for the good, I think.  I became less concerned with what people think of me.  I’m not motivated by people’s approval nearly as much as I used to be.  I began standing up for myself.  I realized that I cannot be everything to everyone all the time…and that’s okay.  I’m a lot more relaxed because I see things from a different perspective – hopefully a little wiser than before.

After pondering the past, I turned my focus to the future and joke that I’ve got one foot in the grave.  Well, based on statistics I do!  This weird sense of, I have to do all the things I’ve ever wanted to because, tick tock, time’s a wastin’!, crept into my thinking.  I felt a surge of self-imposed pressure to fulfill dreams and finally write and complete my bucket list right now.

At the same time, my husband is a few years older than me, and he has been swept in the undertow of being the primary provider for our family for so long he just doesn’t know any different.  He likes his position in life, though he stays continually tired.

He was a bit numb to a mid-life crisis because that takes extra time and energy he doesn’t have. On the contrary, some strange alarm went off inside me and I felt like a racehorse just waiting for the life’s gate to spring open.

What was I do to with myself?  I had a bad case of mid-life crisis!  What in the world is the remedy?  We’re not “stuffy” people so buying stuff isn’t going to fix it.  I’m not going to do anything foolish as the cliché goes.  But where would I be able to put all of this electrified energy and sense of urgency to do something completely out of my norm?

Enter…a mission trip to Africa.

I never saw that coming!  Who knew God had been working behind the scenes for many months to prepare our family’s hearts to go on mission.  We were as surprised as the friends and family we told.  But, we could not deny that this was exactly what God was sitting on us to do.  So we did.

Let me just say that when I look back on who I was pre-Africa, and in full-blown mid-life crisis mode, was utterly resolved in 2 weeks.  Just by reading the above of what I was feeling, it was all so self-centered!  A mid-life crisis usually is.  After all, it’s all about us.

There is nothing wrong with wanting a change in one’s life.  No one can blame someone for wanting shake up the norm a bit or fulfill a life dream.  But, the entire difference rode on the fact that a mission trip is designed for us to serve – not be served.

If we are to live like Christ, we must think like Him.  Matthew 20:28, “…the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

I was standing at a crossroads in life and was tempted to make the second half of my life all about me and my time and what I wanted to do.  My human nature was screaming its demands!  But, then we stepped onto the plane bound for Kenya.  I left my home, family and friends behind.  I also left part of myself.  I stepped off the plane in Kenya and, from that moment on, everything changed.  Not just for me, but for my husband, too.

For two weeks I watched my man of 22 years be on the verge of laughing or crying 24/7.  A part of him awakened – the part that craves life.  He rediscovered a passion for being part of something larger than himself.  A passion for helping others, sharing Jesus’ love, and living life to the fullest.  He also emerged an entirely new husband and father.  We all liked the former one, but this one has zeal for godly leadership in all ways of daily living.  Even his physical countenance changed.  I could not stop staring at him the entire trip, because I watched him morph from tired to totally alive.

I shook off my mid-life pity party over everything I haven’t been able to do, and saw, without blinders, this great big world God holds in His hands and the possibilities it possesses.  I fell in love with the Kenyan people and created bonds with our American team that will last a lifetime. Where my previous focus began to shift on myself, God used this mission trip to gently turn my face back toward His Kingdom work and toward the life that is waiting for me after this one passes.  I have always loved people and diversity, but serving on mission exploded in me a passion for others.  I LOVED serving, helping and assisting the Kenyan folk and our team.  Although I had no idea what I was doing, I was willing to do whatever was needed and we made memories that will carry me the rest of my life.  On the flip side, my heart utterly broke over the poverty Kenyans endure every single day.

Serving on mission was not something we sought out so much as it was what God called us to. God calls all believers to serve in some capacity, and we should all be seeking opportunities.  This was a huge lesson I learned.  It is the most humbling work I’ve ever done.  We serve locally as well, and that is also needed, but there is something very different about  leaving all of our creature comforts, language, culture, everything we understand as our normal, and go somewhere we don’t fit in, yet are so warmly welcomed by those waiting to greet us to work together for a common good – God’s will.  It is a truly unique experience that simply cannot be replicated at home.

A vacation trip of a lifetime is an incredible experience, and there is nothing wrong with that. We’d all love to take one!  But, I saw how vastly different vacations are from mission trips.  I’ve never been so tired, so drained, so energized, so alive – all at the same time – in all my life.  Our trip had purpose and meaning.  The work we began will long outlast the memory of us being there.  I like to watch the Travel Channel with Samantha Brown, Anthony Bourdain and Andrew Zimmern.  I’ve learned a lot as an armchair traveler about the difference between simply being a tourist and immersing oneself in a different culture and experiencing it from the inside out.  I’ll take immersion any day.

We are gearing up for our next mission trip this summer, and I can hardly wait to get started.  I left a piece of my heart in Kenya and will again on this trip I am sure.  When we look at the world through God’s eyes, and see His unconditional, relentless love for it, we must simply be a part of what He is doing no matter where or when.  There are so many bad things happening in the world right now.  But, traveling with God on mission allowed me to see there is a whole lot of good being done as well.

I may have left part of my heart on mission, but I brought back hope, empathy and an intense desire to serve those who need a helping hand. It’s how Christ lived.  He commands believers to do the same.

(Jesus) said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation.” 

~ Mark 16:15

My only regret is that we waited so long to go.  If I could rewind time…but I can’t.  However, serving on mission is something I really look forward to doing as long as I am physically able, and that gets me really excited about the next half of my life.

<<Check out a great book recommendation on my Books page!>>