Psalm 139…Amish-Country Style

Psalm 139 has been my life Scripture.  While in Ukraine, I relied heavily on God’s message in this Psalm for courage and strength.  For instance, I don’t mind flying, but it’s not on my list of favorites by far.  When I fly, I always recite verses 9-10, and it helps me remember who is in control of the plane and the journey.  Or, when I walked 32 flights of stairs to visit with some precious Ukrainian people in their apartment because the building’s elevator was iffy, I heard verses 2-3 roll around in my mind.  God continues to speak to me through this collection of verses, so thought I would share this post again and hope it speaks to you, too! 🙂

This passage has shared mountain-top highs with me and pulled my soul out of the pit.  It is a joy to offer a visual perspective of David’s incredible, tender heart seen through the eyes of the Amish country.

Psalm 139: 1-18, 23-24

Oh LORD, you have searched me and you know me.

You know when I sit

and when I rise;

you perceive my thoughts from afar.

You discern my going out

and my lying down;

you are familiar with all my ways.

Before a word is on my tongue

you know it completely, O LORD.

You hem me in – behind and before;

you have laid your hand upon me.  Such knowledge is too wonderful for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit?  Where can I flee from your presence?

If I go up to the heavens you are there;

if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

if I settle on the far side of the sea,

even there your hand will guide me,

your right hand will hold me fast.

If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,”

even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.

For you created my inmost being;

you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you

when I was made in the secret place.

When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body.

All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!  How vast is the sum of them!

Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand.

When I awake, I am still with you.

Search me, O God, and know my heart;

Test me and know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me,

and lead me in the way everlasting.

Home (Bitter)Sweet Home

Wow, it seems like forever since blogging on this site!  I went offline for over a week as my family traveled on mission overseas.  I had great aspirations of blogging while there (sigh)…

I cannot wait to post some of the pictures from the beautiful city of Kiev, Ukraine.  As pretty as it was, the people are what truly make it special.  We went to Kenya last year on mission and had no idea what to expect this year in Eastern Europe.  A different team of people, a different part of the world, a different set of goals – just entirely different.

As much as I don’t want to admit it, my body doesn’t handle jet lag very well.  I am still getting up in the middle of the night and can’t sleep during the day.  It will be fine, but until my inner clock resets, I am tired.  However, I couldn’t wait one more day to get back online.  So today’s post are some travel pointers I’ve learned over the years in hopes they may benefit you as well.

All-time necessary travel item (besides a passport):  Water.  Airports, planes, buses, hotels, and constant lugging of luggage really dehydrates the body.  I keep water with me at all times.  I will guzzle a bottle down before having to ditch it at security, then buy another as soon as I am able.

Favorite travel accessory:  Eye mask. I can pull this handy dandy item out anywhere, anytime, and instantly seclude myself from the outside world.  It is very helpful to sleep with, but I must confess I wear it sometimes just to give the illusion I’m asleep so I can grab a minute of peace and quiet.  (Shh, this is a secret!)

Favorite luxury item:  Noise reducer headphones.  A teammate on this trip had a pair, and as soon as our first flight landed, I bought some (albeit overpriced) in the airport before making our connection.  I compromised on a pair that was less than $100.  They are noise reducing, but also have a jack to plug into an iPod and give great sound.  So to accomplish almost no noise, I also used a pair of foam earplugs.  I must admit, as long as the Lord continues to let us travel on mission, I may get a part-time job to earn the money for the Bose 100% noise eliminators.  Those, coupled with the eye mask, would be one awesome ride!

Something to schlep stuff in: Eddie Bauer “Daypack.”  It’s smaller than a backpack, but is made to handle the tough stuff and didn’t count as a carry-on (it was in the laptop, purse category so I could still have a carry-on).  It has all of the same cool compartments of a regular-sized backpack, but it’s much more easy to manage.  I’ve tried packs that look like purses and the straps broke from either too much weight or overuse.  I’ve tried traditional backpacks and they are too big and my small stuff sinks to the bottom.  I’ve always said the perfect job for me would be a quality control tester for purses, etc.  NONE have withstood my use.  This EB daypack is the only thing that hasn’t surrendered to my wear and tear.  It has nicely padded straps to wear when you need to be hands-free.  I bought mine at an outlet store on sale.  Okay, I’ll confess.  It was originally a gift for my husband, but now the whole family wants to use it. 🙂

Pack reasonably.  Really think about where you are going and what toiletries and cosmetics you will need.  Creature comforts are great to have on hand, but not at the expense of so many things it’s a scavenger hunt every morning just getting ready.  And, if on mission or active travel, probably half of what we usually use isn’t needed because it’s all going to sweat off anyway.

Use the bathroom!  If one is available – use it whether you think you need to or not.  There is a good chance there may not be another one for a while and that is a miserable situation to be in.

On that note, the Go Girl is a nifty product.  Guys, you may want to skip this part.  Girls, it’s a porta potty – basically a silicon funnel with biodegradable baggie.  My family laughs, but when it’s the only thing available for miles around, and not even ol’ fashioned nature is an option, this is worth gold.  Then who’s laughing?

Journal the journey.  Whether in the notes section of your smart phone, via photographs, or notebook and pen, capture not just the experience but your reaction to it.  Just a few words or sentences or photos.  Enough to be able to go back and fill in the blanks later.  But, assuming you’ll remember every moment is simply unrealistic and unnecessary pressure on oneself.  Personally, I journal through photos.  I’ll snap a picture of something that I connect with or want to expand on later be it a person, place, food, activity, brochure, anything.  It jogs my memory once I’m home.

Avoid ice.  Just a personal tip from someone who learned the hard way.  We made it all the way through Kenya without any digestive issues at all.  Then, on the ride home, both my husband and I had ice in our drinks on the plane.  BIG MISTAKE!  We thought we were going to die we were so sick by the time we got home.  Not worth it.  Unless you are in a familiar place that you know you can tolerate remember this – if you won’t drink the water, don’t eat the ice!

Pack snacks.  Whether traveling with kids, special dietary needs, or just yourself, packing snacks if a real lifesaver.  We pack things that can travel well (peanuts, dried fruit, freeze-fried fruit, protein bars, trail mix, etc.).  More than once these have wound up being a meal when caught in unforeseen circumstances such as harvesting corn in Kenya or tied up in a layover, flat tire, etc.  Most airports have food, but some make you pay dearly for it.  We were charged $5/person for a bottled water or soda on this last trip. Pfft! :O

Travel pharmacy.  It’s very important to take your usual meds as they may not be available where you are going.  However, we go a step further and bring a sampling of popular OTC meds – especially for digestive systems.  Foreign food, little sleep, and hard work can tear up a body and weaken the immune system.  We pack items such as Airborne tablets, Cold Eeze lozenges, Immodium, laxatives, Tums, cold meds, Afrin (for the plane if you have a stuffy nose), pain relievers, vitamins, and a first aid kit.  We filled 2 gallon-sized bags going to Ukraine, granted we are a party of five.  Always bring a thermometer, too, and if traveling really far or foreign, perhaps a round of antibiotics just in case.  We saw strep throat in our team in Ukraine.  It happens!  Keep reasonably necessary meds with you en route (plane, bus, etc. – anywhere you cannot get to your luggage).  Better to curb a migraine at the onset than have to wait hours before your luggage is in your hands again.

Shower shoes.  Buy a cheap pair of flip flops for the shower.  They can cost as little as dollar, and that is far less expensive than paying for treating foot fungus that is very easily contagious.  Every doctor I know travels with them – and so do we!  Like they say, an ounce of prevention beats a pound of cure.

Records.  Depending on where you are traveling, make copies of your health insurance card, immunization record, birth certificate, passport and driver’s licence and securely store them.  The last thing anyone wants is to be far from home and legal documents get stolen or go missing and there is no way to prove who you are.

Well, I will stop here.  I hope some of these are helpful to you.  Can’t wait to blog more of the heart of our journey.  So much to share!  Have a great day, Kristi

Culinary Quest #10 – Loaded Baked Potato Casserole

Looking for a crowd-pleaser that won’t break your budget?  This recipe isn’t rocket science, but it tastes out of this world (sorry, I couldn’t resist that one).  Sometimes I want to bring a dish to an event that I absolutely know everyone will like, but after scouring cookbooks and the Internet it usually winds up costing a fortune!  Not this time…

Who doesn’t like a baked potato with cheese, bacon and butter?  Baked potato “bars” are good and all, but the foil-wrapped potatoes can get messy from trying to squeeze in the toppings.  Plus, the toppings always look a little –  well, tired.  This way, you throw it all together, bake it and ta-da!  You have a nice dish for your family or to take with you.  Great for picnics, dinners, brunch or stay-home movie night.  It is also good as a side dish when grilling – one less thing to tend to when family and friends are over.

It’s extra budget-friendly if you shop sales and get the cheese buy-one get-one free and bacon tends to regularly go on sale depending on the brand.  The rest is nominal.

Loaded Baked Potato Casserole

8                            Russet baking potatoes

1/2 stick                 salted butter

1/4c                       milk (we use 2%)

8oz                         sour cream (we use reduced fat)

1/2t                        black pepper (to taste)

1T                           salt (to taste)

1 pkg                     center-cut bacon

1 bunch                  green onions; diced

2c                           shredded cheddar cheese (Any favorite variety.  I used Triple Cheese by Kraft (Vermont white cheddar, sharp cheddar & mild cheddar w/cream cheese added)

Directions:

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.  Place bacon on vented baking sheet and bake until done.  Drain fat on paper towel.

Peel, halve and boil potatoes until a fork can easily go through them.

Drain and place potatoes in a mixing bowl.

Add butter, milk, sour cream, salt & pepper.

Mix with electric mixer on medium until creamy (no lumps).

Bacon should now be cooled.  Using a large kitchen knife, dice bacon on cutting board into bits.

Blend in green onions and bacon with large spoon into the potato mixture.

Lightly grease a 9×13 baking dish.

Spoon potato mixer into the dish and spread evenly.

Top with cheeses and bake @ 350 about 15-20 minutes until cheese is melted and it is hot all the way through.

***This dish can be made a day ahead.  Simply hold back the cheese, bake the potato mixture COVERED (to keep from drying out) until hot, then add the cheese and bake a few more minutes until it melts.

***For added flare as a dinner side dish, instead of using a baking dish, use individual crocks – fill, top with cheese & bake as directed.

 This is what it looks like prior to adding the cheese.

Culinary Quest #9 – Twisted Blueberry Peach Cobbler

Summer cobbler is so yummy! Apples and cinnamon work in cooler weather, but bring on peaches and blueberries for stokin’ hot temps. Below is our twist on an old-fashioned favorite. The lime gives it a surprise we hope you enjoy. The crunchy top has a granola texture that stays crisp with every bite. Happy summer!

Fruit filling:
4c fresh blueberries

8 medium peaches

1/4c granular sugar

1/2t cardamom

1t vanilla

1t lime juice

1t lime zest

2t corn starch

***********************************

Crumble topping:

2c flour

1/4c granular sugar

1/2t baking powder1/4t cardamom1/4t salt

½ stick butter

2 eggs

**********************************

Drizzle:

1T. honey

**********************************

In a mixing bowl, combine all fruit filling ingredients and toss well. Pour into baking dish (9×13 or equivalent).

In another mixing bowl, combine all crumble topping ingredients. Mix with electric mixer until well mixed and uniform.

Evenly distribute cobbler topping over the fruit mixture.

Drizzle with honey.

Bake for 30 minutes or until topping is brown and fruit is soft and bubbly.

Fruit filling

Ready to bake…

Really?

After taking two days to “fly away to the desert” as David wrote, my heart is heavy over something I want desperately to avoid.  Prayer, tears and good friends’ shoulders have gotten me this far, but time is ticking and I need to face things.

I’ve been speaking to groups for years.  However, recently I was asked to speak on a topic I am uncomfortable with.  Don’t ask me how, as it’s all a blur, but somehow I got through it.  Although, I feel I did a terrible job.  Every time I think about it, I want to run and lock myself in my room.  Well, I’ve almost gotten past that experience, mainly because I vowed I would never ever speak on it again.

Last week, a group of people, completely separate from the first, asked me to speak on the exact same subject!  Arg!  I tried to back-peddle my way out.  I tried to solicit others to step up to the plate to no avail.  I may have kept my composure on the outside, but inside I was throwing an absolute fit!

The subject matter is irrelevant to this post, because it’s more a problem with me.  The subject is fine.  I am not.  Why?  Because I wrestle with the issue at hand myself.  I am not a polished authority on this issue by any means!  In fact, my entire life I have been crippled by this issue.  Why, oh why, did God put me in this position?

I’ll be completely honest and share with you what I confided in my dear friends.  I feel like God has turned a blind eye to my issue with this issue.  I feel a little thrown under the bus.  Neglected.  Ignored.  It feels like life is playing a cruel joke on me by backing me in this corner.  I have been asked to speak to a group of women I have never met, in Europe, with a language barrier, on a topic that I just want to sit down and cry about.  This makes no sense to me.

Everyone has tender spots on their hearts.  Things they’d rather not discuss.  Parts of their lives they want to keep private.  This is mine.  Yet, I am being asked to stand up in front of people and go to the mat over this.  Ug.  My stomach turns and palms sweat.  It’s not the speaking…it’s the subject matter.

We all know what it is like to feel kicked when we are down.  Well, after a lifetime of wrestling this monster, then believing I totally failed in front of the first group of people, why in the world would God even consider me for this task again?  The exact same task!

When I lamented to my friends about this, some very raw feelings came out that I didn’t expect to say because I didn’t know they were in me until they spontaneously spilled out of my mouth.  I blurted out, You know, in every way in my life I want the redemption of Christ.  I want it for my spirit for eternal salvation, I want it for the forgiveness of my daily sins,  I desire re-dos in areas I have messed up.  BUT, this area?  I don’t want redemption.  I don’t want another second chance.  I know people sometimes feel like they’d give anything to rewind time and re-do, or be given another chance, but I don’t want it in this area.  I want the whole thing to just go away!  

Honestly, I’ve never said that before.  It made me so sad to hear myself reject God’s redemption.  Who am I to say any of that?  How dare I.  But, I did.  Does God still love me?  Yes.  Will He ever leave me?  No.  Can He handle such audacious words?  Yes.  Why?  Because He knows.

He knows that the reason I am running from His redemption in this area is because I feel both inadequate and sick of the whole thing.  I want it to go away and never be brought back up.  But, God also knows that in order to honor that wish, it would mean I am left broken in this area.  I amdit defeat.  I quit.  I have been overcome.

That’s not the way God rolls.  We, as believers, are overcomers.

This is love for God: to obey his commands. And his commands are not burdensome, for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith. ~ 1 John 5:3-4

Greater is He in us than the enemy.

You, dear children,are from God and have overcome them,because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. ~ 1 John 4:4

My mind believes all of the lies the world and the enemy tells me.  I believe my own lies, too.  But, my heart yearns to be able to believe what God says about this.  Why can’t I trust Him?

I know, deep down, God keeps bringing me this so I can finally, once and for all, get past this issue.  My head and heart war against each other.  So, with time running out, who am I going to listen to?  God, the world, the enemy or myself?  Ug.

To answer that question, all I can do is go to Scripture for solid Truth.  John 10: 2-4…

The man who enters by the gate is the shepherd of his sheep. The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. 

He calls us by name.  Did you catch that?  We are all unique individuals, fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).  Yes, He knows all of our names and calls us to His heart.  He goes ahead of us that we may follow Him.  I will follow Him across the world and do as I have been asked.  But, Paul said it better than I ever could have dreamed of expressing my angst.  1 Corinthians 2:1-5

When I came to you, brothers, I did not come with eloquence or superior wisdom as I proclaimed to you the testimony about God. For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified. I came to you in weakness and fear, and with much trembling. My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit’s power, so that your faith might not rest on men’s wisdom, but on God’s power. 

I choose to trust God that He is, in fact, in control of this situation and is working out His perfect will in my life and in the lives I will speak to.  I will try my hardest to not look backwards, rather listen to His voice and follow where He leads.

One thing is for sure.  The glory will be all His for what He will do.  He’s moving me forward and requires I bring no baggage. Easier said than done.  But, with God all things are possible.  Even this task.

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.”  Mark 10:27

Okay, God.  Lead on…

The House in The Desert

Yesterday, we looked at Psalm 27 and talked about David’s pause, mid-thought, of a place where there are no worries, fears or sadness.  Guess I’m still in that moment today.  Life is good.  Life is hard.  I can count 100 blessings, but it’s the struggles that drain me.  We muddle through moments of angst, and do what we have to do, but I also relate to David in letting my mind wander to a place where it’s just God and me.

Only there can I shed my coat, like a weary traveler, set my bags down and exhale.  Only there can I take off all of the hats I wear every day and wipe the sweat from my brow.  Only there can I slump into a chair and rest my head on the table, knowing God will meet me at the table with a glass of cold water and a warm smile.  Only there can I sit in utter silence with no worries of filling in conversation.  Only there the dirt my shoes tracked in doesn’t matter, and the familiar smells of home infuse my thinking.  I’m only His child there.  Not wife, mother, friend or worker. I am His child and sit in His house.  It’s safe.  Quiet.  Peaceful.

Everything I need is there.  Moreover, who I am there is enough.  I’m not responsible for anyone else’s happiness there; I’m not a problem-solver; I’m not a worker bee.  I’m just me, and evidently God is okay with that because He hasn’t asked me to be anyone else, nor has He made me feel inadequate for my shortcomings.

In His house, I find my special room.  It’s simple.  A bed, a nightstand and soft linens.  A window for light and a door for privacy.  There, I crawl under the covers and rest my head on the pillow.  I close my eyes knowing He watches out for me.  I sleep while He spreads His wings over me and shelters me with the mere palm of His hand.  There is nowhere else on earth I can go to rest like in God’s house.   He intercepts all that calls for my attention.  I am untouchable and unreachable.

God travels with us in our lives.  Therefore, His house is never far away.  I can find it at the beach, in my own house, in the city, the country, on the Mara, on the subway, under an old tree and on the river.  I can also find it in the desert.

People often associate the desert as a harsh, barren, cursed plot of ground.  It offers neither shelter nor basic needs easily and seems to delight in making accommodations as unpleasant as possible.

Spiritually, people associate the desert with dry times in their life.  Whether it’s not hearing God, not feeling the Christian life or feeling alone, the desert is what our mind’s eye goes to, to describe what we feel.

I think there is yet another way to look at the desert, and David does, too.

He is all over the map in Psalm 55.  He begs God to hear and answer his prayer (v1).  His thoughts trouble him (v2), the enemy and wicked taunt him (v3).  His heart is in anguish (v4). Fear and trembling overwhelm him (v5).  Then verses 6-8 appear. Like a break in a storm, where the rain and wind stop and the sun shines – even if briefly –

I said, “Oh, that I had the wings of a dove!
I would fly away and be at rest—
I would flee far away
and stay in the desert;

(Selah)
I would hurry to my place of shelter,
far from the tempest and storm. ”

What a beautiful metaphor!  In the desert, where is the storm and tempest?  In the desert, we can be alone.  Therefore, we can rest.  Our place of shelter is God’s house, right in the middle of nothing.  When we are walking in our desert and view endless miles of nothingness, it is very easy to spot God’s house.  It sticks out against the monochromatic backdrop of sand and sun.

His house is harder to find in lush jungles, crowded cities or bustling suburbs – whether these are tangible obstacles we face or intangible only in our hearts and minds.

Perhaps the desert is just the landscape we need to find God’s house.  It is not a mirage, rather it is a promise to His children.

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”  Matthew 11:28

Are you a weary traveler?  Do you need rest?  Look for God’s house.  It’s never farther than a prayer away.

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.” John 14:1-4


Sunday Selah

One thing I ask of the Lord,
    this is what I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple.

Psalm 27:4

In Psalm 27, David reminds himself of God’s strongarm against his enemies.  He reiterates God’s mercy, goodness and safety.  Yet, in the middle of wrestling with fear, weakness and unstable circumstances, David breaks away in his heart and seems to pause mid-thought.

He is in crisis.  He feels unsafe of where he is and unsure of what the future holds in the hands of his enemies.  However, I can almost see David stop his heart’s plea and set his gaze on the horizon.  Although his feet stand on a place of longitutde and latitude, his heart escapes to another place and time.  There it is peaceful, quiet and restful.  Indeed, God’s house is a respite, a place of refuge.

Until God calls His chidlren home, we are called to seek Him now – every day.  Where do you find rest in God?

One place I find Him is at the beach.  I am reminded of His greatness of strength, creativity and control.  The rythmic waves crashing on the shore slow my own racing heart, and I come to a place of surrender.

I’m not at the beach today, but I can still find my way to God’s house – in my heart.  His children are His temple, and He dwells in us.  When I surrender myself to Him, I find rest, peace and stillness not found anywhere on this earth.

I encourage you, also, to look and listen for God today whever you are.

The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace. ~ Psalm 29:11

Lord willing, I’ll see you tomorrow back here for more real…deep…stuff.

Have a wonderful Sabbath,

Kristi

Culinary Quest #8 – Mexican Breakfast Flatbread

We love Mexican food!  Just give me chips and salsa and I’m set.  But, for days when a proper meal is in order be it breakfast, brunch or dinner, I set out to create a dish that incorporates savory Mexican taste with traditional breakfast ingredients.

This hearty dish stands alone, and a fork & knife are required for this mucho grande meal.  Adapt veggies to taste.  Use egg whites, reduced-fat cheese, reduced-fat sour cream and turkey bacon to help with dietary needs.

Loaded with veggies, and a kick of lime, it’s a great break from store-bought, frozen breakfast burritos or the predictable taco night!  This flat bread is filling in an “I’m ready for the day” feel, not “I need to go back to bed” feel.  🙂 Enjoy!

Mexican Breakfast Flatbread

Serves 8

One bag                 Fresh pizza dough

2T                           Corn meal

1T                           Garlic powder

1/4t                        Cayenne pepper to taste (optional)

1 bunch                  Fresh cilantro; chopped

1 pt                        Mushrooms; thinly sliced

1                             Red pepper; chopped

½ medium              Red onion; thinly sliced

½t                           Lime juice

2                              Beefsteak tomatoes; thinly sliced (use the centers for most even distribution)

8                              Eggs

1#                            Center cut bacon; cooked & diced

2c                            Mexican blend shredded cheese

2                              Avocadoes; sliced

1c                            Sour Cream

1c                            Your favorite salsa

************************************************************************************

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

On a floured surface, roll out dough till flat using rolling pin.

Place dough on pizza pan or stone that has corn meal sprinkled on it. (To keep the dough from sticking to the pan)

Sprinkle garlic (and optional cayenne pepper) onto dough.

Layer in order: cilantro, mushrooms, red pepper & onion.

Sprinkle lime juice over top.  Add tomato slices.

Bake in oven for 25minutes.

While flatbread is baking, fry 8 eggs in a large skillet on the stove.  I use a little cooking spray to avoid excess fat and break the yokes so they more evenly distributed.

Remove flatbread after 25 minutes, and add eggs evenly on top. Using a spatula, simply cut out the eggs like pieces of a puzzle.

Sprinkle with cooked, diced bacon.  Cover with shredded cheese.

Bake an additional 5 minutes until cheese melts.

Remove from oven and top with salsa, sour cream, and avocado slices on top.

Just veggies at this point…pre-baked.

Frying up the eggs (with a little pepper).

Hot out of the oven…

Bless the meat let’s eat!

Living the Dream

There is an image I cannot erase from my mind.  Travel with me for a moment to Kenya.  At the end of the safari, my family rode in a gutted JEEP back toward civilization.  Our driver, an authentic Masai warrior, barrels over rough terrain, nearly missing zebras, antelope  and wildebeest.  The JEEP throws us around, like an amusement park simulator ride on massive steroids!

(Our wild drive across the Mara.  The dark dots are all kinds of wild animals traveling together)

I look behind me, and the rest of our crew is closing in on us in their JEEPs with their drivers.  It looked like a scene from Indiana Jones with 6 stripped down, dirty JEEPS blazing across the Mara leaving thick dust trails behind them.  Like stunt drivers performing a rehearsed routine, our Masai drivers were in a race to get their JEEP back to the main road first.  This was our amazing adventure for at least 2 hours.  It was the most freeing ride I’ve ever taken.  Wide open plains dotted with wild animals.  Full throttle.  Full sun.  Then…the most unexpected thing EVER happened.

(A sample of the open plain we traversed)

Music!  Music began to play.  Not just any music.  Our Masai warrior hits a switch, and amidst the loud, rushing wind and hair slapping me in the face, Justin Bieber’s song, “Baby” began to play.  What?  Our entire family busted out laughing and asked how in the WORLD did this warrior, who kills lions with his bare hands, get a hold of this music?  I commented that Bieber would probably never imagine his music being the backdrop for a crazy thrill ride across the Mara in Africa.

Our driver, donning his personal machete and gorgeous, exquisite Masai garb, told us that previous travelers turned him on to it.  After “Baby” was done, Jamaican island music rang out over the whistling wind.  Wrong landscape, but surely more fitting than American pop music. Again, a gift from previous travelers.  Bruce asked him how he was playing music in this old, gutted JEEP.  He explained that he had made a homemade iPod of sorts and hardwired it to the vehicle.  We were impressed with his ingenuity!

But, I digress.

As we embraced the rocky, grassy, unmarked plains of the Masai territory working our way back to Kipsigis country, in the far distance we saw the most unbelievable sight!  Every time I think about it I get chills.

Far off on the horizon, we saw a dark figure moving very fast.  Squinting my eyes, straining to see, I caught the glimpse of  a man.  Running.  Foot travel is the mode of transportation for most people in Kenya, but there wasn’t anything typical about this man.  He was wearing athletic shorts, a crisp, white tank top, white knee socks and running sneakers.  None of which had we seen anywhere in our time in Kenya.  Where had he come from, and where was he going?

We all gasped at the same time and said, Surely he is in training!  For the Olympics, perhaps?  We asked our Masai driver and he concurred.  He didn’t know the man, but said Olympic hopefuls do, in fact, train in this terrain.  Our jaws fell agape as we watched, mesmerized, at this mystery man’s grace and speed.  This man was the fastest runner I’ve ever personally seen with my own eyes.  And poise!  His long legs stretched out before and behind him, back straight, arms taut – he didn’t even seem real.

No one has bright, white clothes in the Mara.  They wear native attire.  No one has shoes and socks so brilliantly crisp we could easily spot them from a distance. They are barefoot.  Oh yes, he was training indeed.

And, think about where he was running!  Most runners I see run in the city, suburbs or on greenway trails.  This man was completely alone, running in the land of hungry lions, temperamental Cape buffalo, sly jaguars, wicked- fast cheetahs, territorial hippos, elusive rhinos, venomous snakes and audacious hyenas.  As much as that thought would make ME run like the wind (for my life!), I still could not have done what he did.  He had a goal and was training for a dream.

Did he realize he was living his dream?  How about us?  Are we?  Do we?

For this man, he was already living his dream.  At some point, he stopped his normal day’s work, put on his training outfit (perhaps sponsored by someone?), and took his first step.  That step led to more, quicker steps, and those led to miles and miles of lightening fast, all-out running – racing the wind and daring the company of wild beasts.

I have never seen anything so inspirational of the human spirit.  I’ve watched Dateline and 60 Minutes who produce shows based on the one in a million who beat all odds to compete in sports, music and fine arts.  But, those shows have an ending.  There is closure when the man or woman, child or adult proves they have accomplished their goals.  I never have I witnessed the dream in play.

This man’s race has not yet happened.  Does that make him less of a runner?  Or, does working hard every day – rain or shine, sick or healthy – running the Mara make him a runner?

The answer is obvious.  He is, in fact, a race runner right now.

For those of us who most likely will never train in the Mara, what are the dreams that stir our heart?  They are just as important as this man’s, but do we give them the same credit?

Or, do we choose to let the mundane monotony of life be our excuse for not suiting up (be it arming ourselves with a paintbrush, a pen, a camera, a tool, a musical instrument, or our voices) and accept our place on the sidelines?

God gives us dreams.  Dreams spur on hope, give us reason to fight against hardships and ignite purpose on our lives.  Once we have given those dreams to God, asking permission to pursue them in His timing and for His glory, what holds us back?

I think the biggest thing that holds us back is – us.  We feel our limitations.  We listen to the doubt inside us that reminds us of our inadequacies and past failures.  We measure ourselves against the world and believe that we have nothing to offer.  Surely we are not as good as the next man or woman or child.

This happened to me just recently.  I was trapped in a conversation with someone who made me feel really bad about myself.  The topic was photography.  I will spare you the long story, but suffice it to say I told him, in an effort to end the conversation and diffuse his temper, that I was not a real photographer.  When I said those words, a part of me died.  I totally sold myself out because of a man I barely knew.  I went home and sobbed to my husband that my entire history of photography, that began when I was 10 years old when, for my birthday, my great-grandmother put a 110 instamatic in my hands and instantly I found my voice to the world, was gone.  All of my work, albeit unpaid, was suddenly worthless.  Because I don’t have credentials behind my name, or awards on my bookshelves, or a paycheck to prove it – I sold my dream for the price of exiting a conversation.

I felt numb for a few days.  Perhaps, deep down, this is indeed how I felt about myself, and it took verbally cornering me to bring it out?  Or, perhaps, I reduced myself to the world’s standards and realized I didn’t measure up.  Or, perhaps still, I caved under the pressure and said something I didn’t really believe.

For me, I know it was the third choice. In the days following, God had to show me, in His own unique way, the truth of who I am.  He proverbially picked me up, brushed off my knees and wiped the tears from my eyes.  He showed me who I am in Him, and that person is someone who believes in her dreams and wants to enjoy every part of the journey, whether anyone else believes in me or not.

Ironically, not by coincidence, God recently put me in not one, but two situations where my being a photographer was validated by two separate people – on their own initiative, not mine.  I don’t even know these people.  God caused our paths to cross, and I believe it was to reinforce exactly what I felt about the race runner I saw in the Mara.  Because, what I felt about that man was that although he had not yet won the public affirmation for which he was training, he was absolutely a true runner in my opinion.  No doubt.

The same takeaway is for us.  Perhaps more than a single race to prove who wins; it is ignoring what others say about us; it is the numerous days, months and years of practice; it is the countless miles we run in our own way that validate our dreams.

I once ran a 5K cold.  My daughter was entered in the race, but when we got there, we were surprised to see hundreds of runners and hundreds of their family members and friends.  My daughter didn’t have a cell phone and wasn’t familiar with the trail.  All of her fellow group runners had already begun.  She was alone.  There was no way I was going to let my daughter disappear into a crowd of a sea of people and weave her way through 3+ miles of unfamiliar roads.  Spontaneously, I signed myself up, pinned a number to my shirt and off we went.  We ran the whole thing, but unlike her, I had not trained for it.  Did that race make me a runner?  No!  It made me a protective mother.

My point is, even some who show up for the race aren’t necessarily runners at heart.  Many people have many motives for why they do what they do.

It’s those of us who forge on, despite criticism, despite our own self-doubt, despite the rough travel and slim odds – who are truly living the dream.  The dream is the journey.

Are you living your dream today? 🙂

Sunday Driver!!

Hello!  I’ve missed writing the past two days.  They have been crazy busy, but very productive!  Today I am simply basking in the goodness of God. There are times in life when it’s hurried and harried.  That has been my normal for a while.  Today, not so.  Just relaxing and enjoying the scenery.  As I catch my breath, thought I’d write a thank-you list to God.  The Giver of all good things…

I am thankful today for:

* God’s attention to detail.  Everything really does matter to Him.

* A husband who is looking forward to dinner with me tonight – even after 22 years.

* My dear friend who gave us a dinner date tonight by wanting all of my kids for the evening!

* Children who love their mamma.  🙂

* Friends who have my back, and I theirs.

* Sleep. (It is far underrated!)

* Fun!  So enjoyed having a house full last night for a good time.

* Answered prayer.  Miracles still happen!

* Redemption – yes, of my spirit through Christ, but also in ways only God knows about and tends to…happened just yesterday.

* Hard work.  It feels good to sweat and flex my muscles.

* Laughter.  A good, long laugh cleanses the soul.

* The thousands of ways God has shown me today He loves me and knows my name.

His blessings are all around us.  Are we looking for them?

When I slow down, I notice more of His abundant blessings, because like barreling down the highway, when racing through life our peripheral is blurred.  But, the slower the car, the more clearly we see everything.  So glad to slow down and notice His presence, His peace and His care.  It’s a beautiful sight.  Today, I’m the Sunday driver who is fine to let other cars pass by, and maybe even honk at me.  I’ll let the wind mess up my hair, the sun shine on my face, and the radio drown out the honking.  Ha!